Single Girls Guide To Being Happy:)

Caution

1.) If you are a Single Girl reading this... this is for you.  I work with many young girls at the high school level and at church, have 3 sisters, have been single for quite a long time- So I guess I am an expert?  This silly advice I am about to give you is because of the concerns/ comments/ and questions I get from many young ladies.  Oh and if you are newly single..this will either be annoying or empowering- choose the empowering side:)
2.) If you are a married person reading this... do not get offended... and do not think to yourself....Oh no I have said things like this to Lana and others.  Also do not feel that you are lame because you did not get to do any of these things because you married young.
3.) If you are a guy... I do not know what you can get from this besides knowing that I am single.  I will tell you that this is NOT a boy bashing post... only some boys are dumb- not all:)  This is more for those girls who only value themselves if they have a guy loving them.
4.) I am not an expert, bitter, or expecting to get lots of compliments...I am doing this for all those girls who listen to what society tells them...That all hot, fun, cool girls have a boy by their side at all times which in turn makes them the happiest girls.  I am doing this for the girls who have told me that they wish they had someone to love them.

Fun Questions I have received before (more for humor- maybe you have received these too):

1.)  "I thought you were supposed to get married before your younger sister?"  My Dad was sitting by me during this one and looked at me and said, "It will happen when it is supposed to."  Glad he was sitting there or I might have said something I regretted or cried.

2.)  "You dating anyone"- this is an everyday question, and I do not mind it... especially from my friends and family, but when that is the first thing coming from that persons mouth every time- it gets old.  It is sweet that people care, but why the question before anything else?
3.) "It will happen when you least expect it." I have been "least expecting it" for a few years now... What does that even mean? Haha. That one makes me laugh.
4.) "You are so pretty, how could anyone not like you"...as sympathetic/flattering as you might think that statement is... umm rude.

Single Girls Guide To Being Happy

1.)  Stay away from the movies on a Friday Night.  Go in the afternoon without all the cute couples.  It will do your heart good.  Pretty much don't place yourself in a situation with lots of adorable couples.
2.)  On Valentines Day plan a party... do not go to the dark side and say poor me...it is very easy to do.  Flowers die, chocolates make you fat, and teddy bears are dust collectors - you do not need them.
3.)  Do not fall into the trap of watching too many Chick Flicks or Disney movies- they are unrealistic and depressing.  Do not get me wrong, I am the chick flick/Disney queen, but too many can get you sad.
4.)  Travel!  So many of my friends have told me how jealous they are that I got the opportunity of traveling before getting married...not that you wont travel when you are married...you might just have to wait 40 years.  Go Now!  Just book a ticket and then you will have to go... yes, it is expensive, just bite the bullet and do it anyways.  I would also suggest visiting a third-world country... your love for life and others will change you for the better.
5.)  Work on Yourself- learn how to cook, babysit, visit the sick, learn how to read a map, cook a meal for someone, encourage others, learn how to sew, learn how to pay your own bills or change your own tire, read self help books, go to sporting events, read your bible, do ANYTHING that will make you a good wife someday...you will be better for it.
6.) Figure out what you are good at and Work harder at it...perfect the gifts God gave you now, when you have the time!
7.)  Improve your Relationships with others... your family, friends, church family, work friends.  I try my hardest to go and visit my friends... I am SO glad I have- because we are all so much stronger for it.  I repeat- you have time- lots of time.  Write a letter, email, call, facebook, go visit them.
8.)  Stay Healthy.  OK- so I have just jumped back on the healthy bandwagon a few months ago- so I am NOT an expert.  I just know that when I am the healthiest, I am the happiest.  I am NOT saying you need to be super skinny...I am saying be healthy and happy with yourself.
9.) Weddings- can be a beating for the single folk, BUT you will one day be there, so be happy for them!  Plan the showers, throw the parties, be that awesome bridesmaid (this is coming from a certified Bridesmaid)... and be happy for your friend.  They will all be there for you when it is your turn... well we will see:) jk- I know they will!
10.) Pray for your Future Husband- pray for patience during this unknown waiting time- Know that God is in control- that is the main key to single happiness!
11.)  Do not be around other single people that are all depressed about being single.  Enough Said.
12.)  Plan Goals for Yourself and plan goals for your marriage...I am sure you can all tell I am a planner:)
13.) Budget- stay out of too much debt.  Just call me Lana Ramsey- or child of Billy Wilson, but it is true- live poor now, and be rich later.  I do not want to have tons of debt when I marry... so I am trying to be smart now- it will save you from stress and unhappiness!
14.)  Some people might say to learn how to cook, and practice every night.  I say take a break, because you will start doing this 2-3 times a day for the rest of your life once you get married.  If you can read, have been in the kitchen before, and have pinterest and a crock pot- you will be fine.  Take a break.  I make a lot of sandwiches, salads, chicken salad, oatmeal- simple stuff.
15.)  Hang out with your married friends... single people- they want to hang out still (well some)... do not just stop hanging out with them because you are a 3rd wheel- that is silly.  Learn from their marriages, struggles... see how REAL marriage really is.  Ask them about it!  I have learned something from all of my married friends...yes, I do watch you- no pressure:)
16.)   Buy home decor now (not saying to go hello kitty crazy on them), but just buy what you want.  A friend once told me that her husband is so cheap that he did not want to throw out her stuff...Bingo- she wins.  Some guys really care about decor...so I have taken this one to heart.  Ha.
17.) Volunteer- Anywhere!  Being a teacher I get many opportunities to serve with my students and it is so rewarding.
18.)  Pick a Job you LOVE- this should have been super high on the list.  Some of you might be in high school or in college, but just know that the career you choose is sort of a big deal.  Sorry- some of you may be stressed about this decision.  Think about your strengths and what you love to do... follow that route!
19.) Learn from every boyfriend-  You can learn a lesson from every situation- good or bad.  Even if you think it was all on that person, really think about what you could have done differently.
20.)  Get a Pet?  I am not the biggest animal fan, but I know a lot of people are...so go out and get you that cute little annoying puppy or fish.  Notice how I did not say kitten- cats make me angry.
21.)  Get a Bike.  You feel cool and independent on it- hope it has a bell... you feel even cooler with a bell.
22.) Do not take other people's opinions to heart (at times)- some people really do try to help by saying that you are "too picky", " too this, too that."  You know yourself well enough.  Go with your gut, and try not to get too annoyed when people say you are "too picky," or "why don't you date that person...the one that I would never date myself, but you would be great together!"  Set your standards high but know that no one is perfect.
23.)  It is SO easy to say to yourself...what is wrong with me.  Do not go there- I did about a year ago, and it was pathetic and not very becoming of me.  Instead of thinking what is wrong with me, think how can I improve myself for the person God has waiting for me.  What are your strengths and weaknesses?  How can you improve both?
24.)  Get a Mom or Mom-like figure in your life.  They think you deserve the best, so their opinions on guys and you are usually spot on.  Getting to cry to them is a bonus... they will make you feel better.
25.)  Love yourself and be happy on your own before getting into a relationship!

Closing Thoughts

Once again... I do not mean to offend anyone!  I want to make you think, laugh, and improve.  I am not an expert at all of these things by no means, but I know that these things make me happy when I put my all in them.  Remember:  You is Kind, You is Smart, You is Important.  Don't let loneliness/ the devil get you down and thinking that you are not!  Girls... the devil knows he can work it in the boy sadness department.  Show him by leaning on God's attention, love, and promises.  He gave you this time of singleness for a reason, so use it wisely!

Books that you might find interesting...

If you want a fun read... this is a great book- It made me laugh.  I even have my students in Human, Growth and Development read a chapter just to show how different guys and girls are wired :)  They love it reading and discussing it!



This is another book that I recommend everyone read!  It will make your relationships (in all categories) so much more fuller if you follow these little guidelines:)