Super Mom: Part 3

What age was the hardest?With multiples the hardest age, physically, was infancy to three years. Once they could feed themselves, dress themselves, and were potty trained- life was much easier. The quads went through the "terrible twos" at age 3. One of the most challenging times was when they were all biting each other. I was at my wit's end and never did figure out a good remedy. They finally outgrew it before I resorted to having them bite into a bar of Ivory soap--I had been told it works. Like I say, they quit before I used that one. Emotionally, with all 6 of the children, probably age 18--? is the hardest. Once they have reached the age that they can drive places, you have less control of who they are with and where they go. Oh yes, there are plenty of questions on our part as parents and lots of communication- lots of texting, etc. The older they get, the more independent they want to be and the less they think they need to tell you. Once again, it's hard to let go and we have to turn much over to God. This is the age that you are not there to be their 'best friend' but a parent. (Our kids have never thought we were cool and never will.) As with balancing discipline, we try to use any opportunity to praise them and give positive feedback. They certainly need that, and lots of hugs. :-) I'm pretty sure there have been plenty of times I should have done more of that.


What are the advantages and challenges of older siblings?
It was great that we had 2 other children before the quads were born, because we were not first-time parents and therefore not too overwhelmed with the whole parenting thing. Advantages- just enjoying the sweet interaction between Lana and Cassie with the quads. It was fun to have children who could talk to us when the other 4 couldn't. They were great help with entertaining the babies and picking up their toys. :) Billy and I did not have them change diapers or feed them, unless they wanted to. We tried our best to keep them from feeling over-burdened from it all. Lana was, as always, the leader of the pack, the mothering one. Cassie, very nurturing also. Even to me. She was my sidekick when I was pregnant with the quads, and during the day when Lana was in first grade she was at my side reading the alphabet book to me that she had memorized, as I had to rest a good deal during the day. Lana continued being the responsible big sister when the 4 came. Cassie, on the other hand, had been the baby of the family for 4 years. Imagine her adjustment to becoming the middle child to 4 younger siblings! They were outstanding in their roles, and still are today. One thing that was a great help, was that people gave a lot of attention to our older girls as mentioned before. Little gifts, kind words. It was a challenge to multi-task and go over Lana's school work, having her read to us and reading to Cassie, who was 4 yrs.old, while feeding, changing,and holding babies. Those early years were loud and fun, but very hard work!

What age was the most fun with the kids?
Every age of our 6 kids has been fun and unique. With higher multiples, every phase is a whirlwind, and busy because of so many. Like graduation, for example. Everything x 4. I think after every phase of their life, we are just ready to go to the next phase because we have been through it 6 times and the last is 4-at-a-time. We enjoy it completely and then we're ready to move on and are excited to experience the next big thing in their world. It's been a thrill to see Lana and Cassie as trailblazers for these 4 at home who can't wait to escape! I'll for sure cry when that last one leaves.

What advice would you give young parents?

Advice to young parents...Enjoy every moment!! Don't get so busy with "stuff" that you can't relax and enjoy your kids. Some days you may not get much accomplished around your house if you sit and play with your kids, but sometimes the laundry (UGH!) and dishes can wait. Especially when the 4 were toddlers and L & C were at school, I remember just sitting in the floor and watching Barney with them as they would come to me to sit in my lap or give me a hug. As insignificant as that sounds, there are so many things that a child needs that money can't buy. As they get older, sometimes they just need a parent to listen to them. As teenagers my kids have told me, "Mom, you don't always have to give advice. Sometimes we just need you to listen without saying anything." Something else that I feel is helpful is keeping a sense of humor and trying to look on the bright side. See the good. Number 1: Whatever you want your children to be--let them see that in you.